The Nanny of The Castle
by darkling98zoulless
Summary: If Rick were to choose who he thought that would be the ones to survive through the end of the world all on their own the Dixon's would be at the top of the list. Right after them would be the Barlow's - the only other people he had seen more southern than Merle and Daryl. Probably crazier to if their mutterings about a Nanny and a castle killing everyone are to be believed.
1. Bitchin' Nanny

**=Chapter One=**

* * *

 _I'm not a kind woman. Despite appearances, I'm a bitch. My Ma knew that from day one and my Daddy figured it out soon enough. My brothers had to face a few tantrums in the beginning but they knew which buttons to avoid by the end of it._

 _I am a bitchy person. Not the whine and complain all day kind, rather I'm the hardass that'll slap you upside the head when I thought you were being stupid. Which is too often in my folks' eyes and not enough in mine._

 _So despite me being an evil bitch, I still ended with this... ludicrous job._

 _A Nanny._

 _..._

 _How the hell did I get here._

 _Wait, no, I know. Because of one of our whiny ass pussy moms down the street. Lady had five kids running around and a set of twins in the oven. Margret 'loved' her kids but the damn woman never watched them. Just acted like she did whenever her husband was in town._

 _Man, oh man, oh man could that woman bitch. Acted like it was more important than breathing every time she would waltz over from her farm to ours. Complaining up a storm and nagging at the little ones while she was at it._

 _My Ma had more patience that God Himself after an asshole like me was born. Could handle any spontaneous rants and tantrum like she was going for the world cup. Ma hated nagging though._

 _Fucking hated with more passion than a golddigger towards a stuffed wallet._

 _Probably siiiix? months into Margret's latest pregnancy did Ma snap. Volunteered my ass to watch her kids for Margy. Said some bullshit speel about me liking kids and knowing how to handle them. Margret of course demanded my services from that very day on and decided to tell eeeverybody in our small colony of farmers that I was The Nanny._

 _Not "a Nanny" but "The-goddamn-Nanny". Swore by my name more than Bible during her saleswoman pitch. Threw my bitchy self underneath the bus thinking it was a swimming pool the damn ditz._

 _Of course me actually liking children and knowing how to handle them legitimately did. Not. Help. At fuckin' all._

 _By twenty I had my own little business going and my own couple acres of pasture and a house big enough for thirty and going. Whole town pitched into building it after I saved some of my kids from some wanna-be-country city asshats that didn't clear the field before starting up a shooting range over by old Ben's farm. Saved his granddaughter that day by taking a bullet to the thigh._

 _Hurt like a mother fucker but since then the whole town thought I was a goddamn child guru. Or some kind of humanised gaurdian angle if you listen to the pastor._

 _As much as I complain, my twenties and early thirties really were the golden days. I practically raised all the kids in town and when they had grown up it showed. They didn't bitch like I did but they were smart, knew how to end an argument with words rather than fists by watching me talk down our more shady folk in our 'ville. Nasty and uncouth when they got all fired up but they rarely raised their fists._

 _They were good kids and in the thirteen years I raised them they became good men and woman._

 _I'm a hardass but I'm proud of each and everyone of them. They knew it too. Jen, Maxwell, Sam and Sammy, my own brothers Peter and Ash, they were good kids and good adults. Good, upstanding, and talented people._

 _It's what broke me a little inside when they left town._

 _Being a Nanny - coerced or not - makes it so that each and every one of your charges gains a little spot in your soul. They cling like fucking mold and they stay forever, no matter what you do to try and disway the matter._

 _So while I didn't cry, I watched every second of my older kids college graduation. Demanding pictures and for them to put a damn smile on because they were all grown up now and the house needed some fuckin' photos anyway. The assholes whined and played around but I knew that they wanted a small bit of them to stay with me as they left. And they would leave._

 _I was born in 1973, Peter was next twelve years later in July of 1983 and Ash was right behind him in August the following year. The twelve year difference meant that we were raised with two different fucking principles and goddamn manners in mind._

 _I was taught how to be independent from a young age. How to do shit without getting sent to the hospital and without much adult supervision. I was practically an adult in my own right by the age of seven._

 _I was taught how to grow up early and as the first born I was given every bit of responsibility that my parents could think of. Knew just about everything to do with farming or at least enough to get by for a season or two since I was eight. It was an unspoken expectation that I was going to take over the farm once I became of age and my Ma and Daddy were going to retire._

 _Then Peter was born and Ash a year later._

 _They were babied and taught to dream big. They weren't chained down to this old town like I am - they were going to be free._

 _I couldn't bring myself to hate them for their freedom but I wasn't above admitting I was jealous._

 _Then I became a fucking Nanny of all things and I knew without a doubt that this small town of farmers and cattle workers was where I'll die. Instead of being chained I was setting up my funeral home while I was still young and heathy._

 _Honestly I didn't give a damn, saved money and didn't have to move my fat ass out of the comfy corner of our town if I stayed. I liked where I was and didn't give a fucking damn what our new citizens thought. I knew everyone and everyone knew me. Shit happens and within the hour I'd have known about it and nine times out of ten I'd be sent out to stop that argumentative shit._

 _The kids were used to me being the unofficial sheriff. I doubt that they'll get too much of a culture shock when they went City but whatever the fuck happens - it'll give them fucking whiplash in the beginning. Little smartasses will figure it out though, they'll survive._

 _When our pastor told us just seven months after our little shits left town that God had told him that they had a year before the dead would rise again that's what I told myself. "Little smartasses will figure it out, they'll survive."_

 _It was all I could do as the folk of our town - not the city folkes out on vacation or visiting - got preparations in place. We sent out letters for jobs and to our relatives and friends away from our little town and told them our pastor's vision._

 _Some were in denial, others decided to stand their ground at their new lives but a small handful returned. My brothers stayed out and sent back supplies every Saturday to The Castle - the name of my damned Nanny daycare - but they stayed in the fucking death trap called a city. Stayed in Atlanta to bring news to our small town._

 _While they were being fucking country ass ninjas we fortified The Castle. In the town meetings we noticed that my land was one of the larger pastures and had ground work for a stone wall in place already. I had a three foot by three foot wall around the property already to discourage coyotes and rabbid dogs._

 _No one mentioned the fact that was where all the kids were most comfortable with anyway._

 _While we prepared our pastor, our dear Father John, warned us on his death bed (because he was a hard-working old fuck that was a dumbass and got a heat stroke while building up the wall) warned us that I was one of the few adults still alive in the dream. That try as we might most of the town will die and some of the children will too._

 _Everyone grieved but we were tough fuckers. We grieved as we worked and blessed the grounds of The Caste with fuckin' blood, sweat, and tears. I had a photo room now, copies of photo albums, stand alones, and portraits were in that sun room. Kids called it our "Memory Palace" a place to remember and grieve in but that was it._

 _That was how we grieved. Building and pushing forward and leaving all that memory shit in one place so that no body forgot the past. It...it isn't a good way of coping with the fact most of us will die in the coming of the apocalypse._

 _Parents distanced themselves from their children slowly and regretfully and the youngers didn't notice the change. They spent most of their time with me anyway, all that changed was that their rooms in The Castle became much more permanent. Their distanced parrents leaving the boxes of family memories and most of their possessions outside of our gate._

 _It fucking hurt like a bitch to watch but we are a hardy town - fed a hammer and shit out nails kind of people. We were smart too and everyone knew that I as a fucking Nanny and with a retired soldier as a Daddy would give the new generation the best fucking God blessed chance to survive the shit storm coming our way. I knew how to talk to kids, how to teach them, and how to protect them. Like some kind of fucking den mother on steriods._

 _Eleven months after Father John told us of his vision and the preparations began, every person wrote a few books. One was a will, another was their life story, and for most the final book was any survival tips that they knew. How to farm or take care of the cattle and other animals. How to track and make snares and how to make homemade weapons or essential supplies. They all wrote a small survival book of their knowledge and shit._

 _The parrents wrote a fourth book to their kids so the kids knew all the fucking love their mothers and fathers had to their babies._

 _Then we waited for the shit storm to hit on the last month._

 _..._

 _Our dead pastor was right when it hit. Only I and the two pregnant woman in town - Jill and Nancy - were the adults to survive. Everyone else was slaughtered. By the undead and by passing groups of survivors that pillaged the town as they tried to head away from the city. There were a few people that survived outside though. Mainly farmers like the Greenes down west a few dozen miles._

 _Hershel Greene - the stingy fuck that didn't see eye to eye with me because I wasn't a fucking coward denying reality like he did. I openly admitted to beating the shit out of any passerbys like the Roaches and the survivers. Pillaged and stole all the shit on them or in their camps like a black woman at the grocers' on Black Friday._

 _He had his head up his ass in denial. Spoke shit about the undead roaches being more than the cockroach fuckers I considered them to be and just fucking sick. "God is sending us a message and when we learn our lesson our sick people will be cured. We just have to wait it out - they're still human."_

 _Pansy ass fucker was going to get his small town and naive family sent to hell in a week if he kept this shit up._

—

The dead were rising. Jesus fucking Christ his Sis was right. Hoooly fucking shit.

Peter looked calm, way too calm to the people around him but on the inside he was screaming in fear and pissing himself. He had _known_ a shit storm was heading their way. He had believed his hometown's Father but _zombies. Mother fucking, honest as hell_ _ **zombies**_ \- he hadn't believed that shit.

Now it was about to bite him in the ass.

"ASH! GET YA PANSY NERD ASS DOWN HERE!" Peter slammed a brick into a skull of one of those rotting fucks and screamed again for his baby brother, "TAY BROKE TA FUCKIN' DOOR!"

"Shit!" The ass jumped the stairs and handed over one of the emergency axes he had scavenged up. The pale fucker brought out his own and a knife in case and Peter nodded before shoving him back a step. "Get ta bags - I didn' have time with these dead fucks ta scavenge this floor but I fuckin' know tha' thera few crowbars in dis pansy ass department."

"You always say tha' dumbass" Ash grunted, filling up bag two with all the cans and preserve shit he could find.

Peter slammed his axe into another shithead and snarked, "Doesn't make me less right now does it fucka'?" He cackled, swinging the weapon around like he was born doing it into another two corpses. Sending one of the skulls flying to one of the trapped civlians feet. At the woman's shriek Peter remembered the rest of the dumbasses stuck in the store with them.

Bunch of them were dead and undead by the time the brothers had made it downstairs where they'd been checking out the jackets up there. Peter had made quick work of them by locking the glass doors and grabbing a few hammers in the hardware section to bash the skulls in. Scared the lucky civies to hell and back but he got shit done. Ash had run upstairs again and started pillaging for shit immediately, just like Sis taught them, much to the panicking managers distress.

A few costumers joined in but a lot of them were grabbing things they _wanted_ and wasn't that fucked up?

Ash came back with three loaded bags and a crowbar (fucking called it mother fucker) and Peter ditched the trapped civies and climbed the stairs to the roof. Ignoring the screams of the dumbasses that didn't grab a weapon in the fifteen minutes Peter had been holding off the Rotters.

No one followed them and Peter hadn't seen any one he cared about besides Ash downstairs and he knew for a fact that no kids were in the building today. Ash had checked while grabbing shit.

The men sprinted up the staircase to the roof, locking the inside door handle by breaking it off with a small sledge hammer Ash found. Peter gaped at the chaos they could hear, at the over run streets below.

"Hola fuck Sis was righ' - Fatha John was righ'." Ash breathed.

"Ya,"Peter swallowed,"Tay were fuckin' righ'."

A bang from the door behind them and brothers cursed, searching for a fire escape or a close enough roof that they could jump to. A plausible thing since they were in downtown where the buildings were scrunched together as they competed for space.

"Peter - ova here ya slow ass!"Ash waved.

Peter bit back a retort and ran over, snagging the hiking bag at his brothers feet and scaled the ladder down. Hacking into the Rotters around him at the bottom as Ash moved his slow ass down with the two duffels. As soon as his brothers feet touched the ground they were out. Going mindlessly through alleyways and Rotters as they tried to escape the mayhem.

* * *

Hours later they finally stopped, breathing heavy and with stitches in their side as they looked around to see where the fuck they were. If Peter was seeing shit right the brothers had managed to go uptown in their mad scramble and curl around Atlanta to the mountains fourty minutes by bus away. Holy crap they got lucky.

"Remind me ta kiss Sis' feet when we get a' asses back to Ta Castle." Peter gasped, stretching his limbs as they took a breather, "Alla' tha army shit she went through an' shoved down ah throats jus' saved ah asses."

"No fuckin' joke?"

"None - hike here evra' Wednesday since we moved," Peter groaned,"Know a quarry wit a lake just ah couple miles up. Anotha' thirta mins an' we be tha."

Ash groaned but reshouldered the bags,"Lead ta way fucka'."

"Leadin'," Peter hissed before taking off at a lope.

* * *

It was a stressful run and by the time the brothers made it they were ready to collapse. Not because the hike was bad - they were country boys with a hardass of a sister that put them through the ropes once Da finished training her up. They knew how to survive and were prepared for shit to go down from the letters but the dead rising? Having to abandon those people in the store so that they could return safe and sound to their Sister?

The emotional exertion of the day was hitting them harder than their hours of sprinting and the strain of killing the Rotters did.

Peter groaned in dismay but pushed forward. As comfy the ground looked his Sis' voice was ringing in the back of his head. Demanding he go further into the tree line and up a sturdy ass tree before making camp. To fill up their empty bottles with a drop of iodine and the lake water he knew was there. Fuck he needed to check goddamn inventory too.

Ash chuckled,"Her voice ringin' in ya ears too?"

"'Wha' ya'll thinkin' stahppin' naw?',"Peter mimed, voice a bit higher with a more southern edge to it,"'Get ya ass unda' some cova' an' haul ya fat fake City asses upa tree boy!'"

Ash snorted,"Sounds aba' righ'. Hardass bitch Sis is but damn did she giv' us sum comm'n sense while she wa' ad'dit"

"Tru' dat."

They kept chatting and bickering as they went. Mindful of the fallen branches and hidden potholes as they tried to find a sturdy enough tree that would be a bitch to climb. As backwards as it was, the brothers knew that of it was a fucking fight and a half for them then it was a damn near impossibility for any passerbys.

Ash ended up finding one that near the edge of the cliff hang by the lake. Hauled ass up there with a triuphant "Mine bitch!" as Peter cursed below him shaking a fist at the laughing ass. The light haired brother cursed and grumbled but found a suitable tree soon enough. It was a neighboring one lucky enough and a bit further in the treeline.

Peter tightened the bag straps and started climbing. Grunting as an entirely different set of muscles started burning the further he went up.

"Ya okay ya fat ass?" He heard Ash call out, "Needa ladda' Petie pie?"

"Jus' cause ya part squirrel don' mean ya can be ah asshat!" Peter hissed.

"Sur' ah can ya big baby."

"Waheva ya squirrelly fucka'! Suck ma dick asshole!"

Ash snorted,"Hell nah - I know whar tha shit has been,"

Peter laughed and finished scaling the damn tree. As worrying as all this shit was - fucking _traumatizing_ that shit _is_ \- it felt almost like background noise as the habitual bickering between him and Ash picked up. It was normal for them to fuck up or mess around with the shadier sorts and be able to shrug it off by bitchin' at each other.

It was a bit of a daily ritual that he clung to viciously as he and Ash set up for that night. Organizing their supplies and shit as they bantered quietly while the sun set. Peter called first watch as they ate a can of mixed fruit which sent Ash into a weird ass rant of Peter not playing fair even if the chestnut haired man-child was the baby of the family. It almost made Peter fall out of the tree from laughter if it wasn't for the ghetto harness of rope he'd made that settled him comfortably against the trunk as he ate.

With all his funny ass bitchin' and rantin' Ash tired out soon enough after Peter's laughing fit (which had sent him on a nasty but still funny as fuck rant about the asstry that was Peter) and conked out just after sun down. Peter left him be and settled into the role of being a silent gaurdian. Letting the night noises settle over Ash's quiet breathing as he waited and watched.

He left Ash be until hours before first light, telling the far too cheery brother to take watch for the next six hours. He needed rest or else he'd end up making a fucking mistake that could get them both killed.

And like fucking hell would he do that shit.

* * *

Couple of days passed like that, the brothers sinking into the nature and mountains around them as they tried to create a routine that would settle them a little bit. Routines were good, that meant that they had a plan and could move forward and away from the city. It meant that they were becoming stable through the horror that they went through.

Peter and Ash only went back in Atlanta once since their mad scramble away from it. Going into the chaos to steal from the outer ring of stores and grocers' before hauling ass back to the quarry.

It was bad in the city. Gunfights and gore everywhere and the streets shut down and the highways backed up. It took half a day to get there and back but the brothers didn't dare steal a car. The noise would condemn them to the Rotters and made them a target to the military and those struggling in the middle of it all.

It pulled on their morals to not help out but every time they so much as thought of it a phantom sting would grace the back of their heads and their Sis' words ringing through their ears loud enough for the brothers to flinch.

 _"I knaw it seems mo' lika horse shit storay tha' ya can believe but ya can't help anyone. Nun den fuckas giva horse's ass aba' y'all whan tha shit storm finally roles on en. Ya two ignore dem all ya hear mah! Ignore all a' dem an' focus on covera'n each otha's asses than no strangas. Fuck dem! Fuck any surviva' ya come across an' head home when shit calms adown a bit! Y'all come on home en one piece or I'll whip ya myself!"_

It was those words and the image of their big sister's face, all hardass looking with the tiniest of tears gathering as she stared at them worriedly through their phones,that stopped them. Peter and Ash hadn't known their parents well in the beginning and it showed when shit like this popped up.

If their sister hadn't demanded that they ignore the survivors and only focus on each other then they would be out there. In the city and trying to rescue as many people as they could with their bleeding hearts.

They had managed to block out the guilt but the sixth day in the quarry and Ash snapped.

"I know she told us not ta' bah damnit Pete! Dis _hurts_ an' I hate it! I hate da fact she told us no an' now I can't help nawn!" He ranted, baby blue eyes shining with guilt as he ran a dirty hand through his grease mop of hair."I dun know how Sis' can be ah hardass an' jus' _ignore_ people in need bah I can't. I'ma too soft bruther an' dis hurts."

Peter just tugged his baby brother close and led them down to the lake. Setting him up for a wash and cleaning him up of all the gore and sweat of the past couple of days as the younger teared up. Peter mourned the fact that his baby brother was going through hell. The brat had always been the kinder one of the trio. A real country southern boy that tried to help whoever was in need.

It used to be a winning factor that Sis and him had praised him for, now it could kill him if the older siblings didn't stop him.

"God made ya ta be a kind one," Peter started,"Handed all the selflessness ta ya when ya were born. If the world hadn't gone ta shit ya'd be happy. Be able ta help all dos helpless fuckas ya want"

Ash laughed bitterly but didn't say anything as Peter bathed him like he was a baby again. Gentle and thorough as the grime and blood and sweat was taken off his pale skin with each wipe of the rag.

Peter continued,"I'm not tellin' ya ta stahp bein' ya buh ya gotta choose naw. No more save ta strangers off da street an' all thata holy angel crap ya do."

Peter let the words settle on his brother and guided him to a rock nearby to dry in the evening sun as he washed himself off. Relief palpable as the Rotters' blood he'd been stuck with came off.

When he finished he went back to the rock to find his brother gone but a clean set of clothes where he had been. Peter huffed through his nose and smirked a bit. Typical Ash, get all embarrassed about the emotional shit and hide away but still leave a clean set of clothes for him.

"Damn softie he is," Peter muttered,"betta choose fast babay bruther."

He tugged on the clothes, a pair of cargos and a blank t-shirt with fresh socks. It was refreshing to dress in something clean again after running loose in the wild in the gore clothes.

He'd just finished shoving his feet into his ratty combats and snagged his pack when Ash's scream rang out over the lake.

 _"LEGGO AH ME YA BASTARD! LEGGO!"_

"Ah _fuck naw_ ," Peter snarled, ditching the bag and sprinting up the cliff trail. His heart was thundering and he was ready for blood. No fucker touched his brother - no one.

Peter dashed by their camp - Ash wasn't there damnit - and ran further into the quarry hoping to God that was where he was.

He broke the tree line just in time to see some cop fucker haul Ash into the middle of a gang of people. Got his baby brother in a head lock with a hand over his nose and mouth. None of the group deemed to step up and stop the cop from strangling the struggling twenty-four year old. Of course not.

Even though it went against all the training his Sis taught them for hostage situations, Peter charged. A wordless roar of anger passing through his bared teeth as he launched himself at the city mongruel. Punching at the man's back directly on the right shoulder bone. The man yelped and flexed to get away from the digging fingers and dropped Ash. Ash scrambled backwards in the dirt and tried to breathe through the pain in his throat and side.

The sight of his brother just struggling right there in the dirt surrounded by all these people made him see red.

"Ya nasty fucka'!" He snarled sending a hay maker to the off guard assaulter,"I'll kill ya for touchin' him ya hear mah!"

The fucker dodged and tried to whirl around to grab his gun at his hip but Peter wasn't having it. He got up close and personal and made a jab for the trachea as he sent a punch to the guy's stomach. The cop dodged the jab but ended up with the punch hitting his side just below his ribs harshly.

The guy choked and sputtered but Peter didn't let up. Using every bit of knowledge Sis taught him to leave the guy disabled and in pain. He ignored the screams and demands to stop and went to town. Punching and kicking and out right _punishing_ the fucker for going after his baby brother.

Peter didn't stop until someone jumped on his back and pushed on the back of his knees to make him buckle. It was Ash's favorite ambush move so Peter relaxed and took a step back and bore the weight of his brother instead. He was crying and muttering for Peter to stop too distressed from the violence to see that he already had.

Peter cursed and shifted Ash around so he was clinging to his front instead. It wasn't difficult to carry him like this, he took after Ma more than Daddy and was a bit short and looked like a muscley twig rather than the humanized mountain that Peter looked like.

"I stahpped Ash...it's all don naw, ya gotta calm down fer me little bruther." Peter muttered softly glaring over top the mess of wet hair at the conflicting looking crowd and the pissed cop on the ground. "It's ahll righ' naw."

"No more fightin'?" Ash asked, grip tightening painfully around Peter's shoulders and waist."Not gonna pull a fast one ar'a?"

Peter snorted,"Nah, pansy ass learned 'is lesson."

Ash nodded and let go of him. Eyes wary and throat visibly purpling as he stood shoulder to shoulder with Peter angled slightly in front.

"Naw tha tha's all settled,"Peter drawled,"Mind tellin' dis country bumpkin da fuck ya were doin' draggin' mah baby bruther through da woods like dat?"

* * *

 **Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead in any way, shape, or form. I do own the OCs presented in the story and this story itself though.**


	2. Pansy Ass Nanny

**=Chapter Two=**

* * *

 _For all of the horror right outside my mother fucking "blessed-to-be" gates, the apocalypse wasn't so bad._

 _Of course I know that it's only because of my walls and the pit falls surrounding the barrier. If The Castle hadn't been fortified like fuck like it is then none of us goddamn assholes would be alive right now. Too fuckin' big of a group with too many liabilities and untrained people. I need to fucking_ _whip_ _these smart asses into shape. Just in case._

 _We're so busy trying to stay hella calm right now and I need some goddamn patience. Can't jump the mother fucking gun or I'll get people killed - kids killed._

 _Shit, even when the dead are rising I'm acting like a pansy ass Nanny. Holy fuck that's kinda depressing. No matter what I'm gonna be this, the Nanny of twenty fucking little ones, two pregnant ladies, and two dozen of my grown ass charges. I'm waiting for the punch line._

 _Anyway, it's been twenty days since the town got run-over. My oldest asshats - Sam and Sammy - came back just last week. No damage done to either of them but no news on Peter and Ash._

 _I've been a drill sergeant in my quest to ignore my worry for them. That shit ain't working much but fuck it. I can't let myself get all sappy and shit._

 _All my kids, from ages two to seventeen, see me as the boss. The King of our Castle and damn is that a burden to carry. I wouldn't ditch it for the world though because my kids are still laughing. Still dancing in the front lawn and having water fights on Sundays. Little fuckers still try to skip out on chores too, funny enough._

 _Enough of the happy shit though, got bad news._

 _First of mother fucking all, we got a dick load of a pest problem._

 _Those undead fuckers - fucking cockroaches - are swarming to the cities. Got our pussy ass radio to work and the piece of shit was blaring government messages for a fucking hour before I broke that shit into pieces again. Honestly, thank fuck it was only Sam hanging out with me in the kitchen. Kiddos were being entertained by that smart ass Sammy and the pregger ladies were upstairs for a nap._

 _If they had heard the fucking shit that rat bastards were spewing I'd have to switch to being a bitchin' psychiatrist in order to handle the aftermath of that bullshit._

 _Radio fuckitry wasn't the worse thing to happen though._

 _Our Pastor was right when he told us I was going to one of the only adults in town alive. Used to go out in the beginning, looking through the other plots and farms for any sign of survivors. Nothing but gore and shit. Roaches were all adults in a fucking small town, the youngest one I've fucking seen or heard about was thirty year old Cooper getting munched on like some kind of fucking McDonald's goddamn special._

 _Cooper had been one of Bitchy Marge's._

 _I feel empathy for the dead fucks but I can't stop the thankful mother fucking, Jesus Christ prayer that it'll stay that way._

 _The worse part is that kids, the little ones, aren't affected at-fucking-all by their parents absence. I knew even before the shit storm hit that Margret's plan to get me into the babysitting business was a bad idea and now I can see it._

 _The kids read the books about their parents passively, like that heartfelt shit was from a distant uncle rather than their now dead Ma and Pa. I... I don't regret becoming what I am. You can bet your ass that I don't regret that the kids aren't grieving and are able to continue their happy as hell lives like the ditsy little smart asses they are._

 _I feel bad for the dead though._

 _Still fucking hope that they'll stay dead like the lazy asses they all were before all this mess. Don't need to deal with the fucking bullshit of the adults now getting off their fat asses only to try to take a fucking chunk of meat off of me._

 _Bullshit man. Utter. Bullshit._

 _Shit! Anyway-_

 _I catch the kids...watching me at times_ _. Like some goddamn freaky ass China doll that blinks_ _and giggles when it gets caught fucking STARING before asking to play hopscotch with you._ _Always_ _fucking_ _happens when they have the hand written books in their laps. They look at the pages for a bit and then just_ _watch_ _._ _The little shits._ _I found out a few days ago why._

 _Tommy, little red head prankster that was almost four, had tripped down the stairs Thursday. Broke his wrist on the fall down._

 _I was in town scavenging but when I came home I_ _fucking_ _found_ _out_ _that he_ _goddamn_ _cried himself to sleep_ _wailing for his Mama. Felt like a shit stain when I heard that. Tommy was one of Margret's kids too, her eighth and the baby of the family. Margret died by the Roaches when our town first got hit. Turned into_ _a fugly Roach_ _herself and I had to... I had to kill th_ _ei_ _r nagging bitch of a mother. Bad enough I had to kill their_ _badass_ _big brother Cooper but now Marge?_

 _Tommy doesn't know any of this shit. Cried for his Mama until he goddamn fell asleep from the fucking stress and pain. He was going to call for his Mama again when he woke up._

 _I'm going to break his fragile fucking heart when I tell him that the nagging pansy was dead. Bitch though she was, she loved her kids._

 _So I waited at his bedside as he slept. Yelled out what chores needed to be_ _fucking_ _done and left a list_ _of all the crap_ _in the kitchen before I went upstairs to Tommy's room. The kids watched me leave as the older brats bitched and whined as they started on the chores. Every once in awhile one of the kids would join me in my waiting game. The younger ones demanding cuddles while my teenagers sat their asses down and watched me without even trying to act discreet. Shameless bastards._

 _It was around dinner time (Nancy fixing together with some help from Sammy since I was still upstairs) when Tommy finally woke up. Groaned in pain and cried a little but I settled him with a sharp "Dun move dumba'. Gonna break ya fuckin' a'm 'gain if ya keep thata up."_

 _I didn't expect Tommy to act like he did. Sure, I wasn't surprised about the fucking giggles, all the kids laughed at my too-southern accent, I just didn't expect him to call me fucking Mom. I swear to fucking God I checked over my goddamn shoulder to see if that bitch was a ghost or something. But hell naw, Tommy was calling_ _me_ _Mom. The hell man!_

 _And the little shit did, calling me that without hesitation and clear eyes as I sat still on my fat ass with my mouth gaping like a bitchin' moron. Kid didn't see anything wrong with it, just kept giggling for a minute._

 _Since then the damn word spread faster than a hooker's legs._

 _Every morning at breakfast I'd hear a choir of "Hi Mom"s or "Good Morning Mama!". First day it freaked the shit out of me and I just stared at everyone as the group gave me shit-eating grins at my obvious shock. My teenagers and grown ass babies were especially happy to call me their fucking Mom to see me and my brain just fucking STALL. As fucking cheesy and pussy it sounds, I felt something warm and sappy glow in me every time they called me that._

 _Never expected to be a Mama. Especially not to a hoard of children I didn't get fucking preggers to have and a-fucking-specially NOT during a goddamn zombie apocalypse._

 _I am though. Shit, getting fucking soft with this name calling nonsense._ _Bunch of pussy bullshit!_

 _Sure didn't fucking act like it though. Didn't do the whole "express emotions" shebang._

 _Plus it added a bit of a burden to my shoulders. Didn't know how to act like a parent - knew how to be a caretaker and a gaurdian hell yeah but not a parent. My own dead Ma and Daddy had been fucking kinda_ _"_ _out there_ _"_ _when they were alive. Didn't know how to do this parenting shit so they just winged it apparently._

 _I couldn't afford to do that damnit!_

 _I'm a bitch, a hardass, a complete sap unable to properly understand other's emotions let alone my own. Couldn't translate my emotions properly into my body language and facial reactions. If I couldn't even fucking explain how I felt enough to let other people know by looking at my_ ** _face_** _..._

 _How the fuck am I supposed to teach these kids too?_

* * *

"These people 're fuckin' _weird_ Petie."

"Thatta they 're Ash. Thatta they 're."

Ash drew a breath and just _stared._ How the hell did these simpletons make it this far? They didn't know the meaning of survival even if Ash threw a dictionary at their face. "Dis group is ah gonna die inna week."

Peter snorted but didn't comment. Even though he'd been saying it on repeat for weeks now... Ash knew he was right, the group had too many "alpha" people trying to survive together. The cop (he held back the urge to rub at his healed throat), the older blondie, the Mexican Daddy, and that weird black guy that insisted everyone called him "T-dog". All the bastards did as they sent the woman to do the chores was bitch and argue with each other.

They had been "working together" for two months now.

...

Seeing what he's seeing...hopefully the dumbasses will die soon.

He glanced at the few kids running around. All the dumbasses could die but he would hope the kids didn't. Ash was as bad as Izzy was at attracting the little guys. Ever since that honestly bullshit first meeting he'd been mothered on and had somehow gained a trail of small humans whenever he walked into camp.

It didn't bother the brunette much but it was still disconcerting. Ash was used to Izzy being surrounded by children especially after she became a Nanny. So while he knew he had a bit of that natural pull to kids his sister's pull was a hella stronger.

Which was why he was totally not-hiding above in a tree as Petie kept look out.

"Ya need ta ge' ova yaself babey bruther, dem kids looks like tay gonna cry if ya keep runnin' off like dis."

Stupid Petie,"Shuddup,"

For a second Ash thought he was safe and then Petie's hand was darting up and yanking the younger down to the ground. With a yelp Ash crashed down and stared dazzily at the falling leaves and the too bright sky. "Ya fucka'."

Petie just smirked and nudged him with a foot, making Ash grunt. He glared and hissed but Petie just shrugged it off like water.

"Make yaself useful an' be ah entataina fur today."

Ash gave his brother a funny look, "Ya on drugs or sum shit?"

Petie gave him a dry look and lumbered off into the woods. Probably to double check their camping spot before going hunting. Hopefully they'd get some meat today.

Distraction now gone Ash got up grudgingly and made his way through the cluster fuck of a camp. The invading group had been at the quarry for seven weeks now and it showed. Activities were being completed at a calmer pace, stress was starting to fall off people's shoulders, and most importantly, they were getting used to Ash and Petie.

Besides that violent ass called a cop of course.

Mother fucker was a goddamn control freak. Took the position of bossman without necessarily everyone in the group's consent. Treated him and Petie like shit too. Kept insisting that the brothers were useless and some kind of crazy town fellas whenever he thought they weren't in ear shot. Tried to kick them out way too many fucking times, kept glaring at Ash too. Which just set off Petie's overprotective, big brother instincts like a stick of dynamite. Now neither of them could stand being in the same space as the other.

Shane the violent ass, prejudice cop versus the country-as-hell brawler, Petie.

Ash could practically see the World War Three in the background whenever the two made eye contact.

Ash shook his head and gravitated over to Carol, a shy mother of little blonde Sophia and married to the jerk off Ed. Ed was another guy that just... grated on Ash's nerves. Almost as bad as Shane does.

Carol was packing up the dirty laundry again when Ash made his way over and his southern gentleman mindset perked up and took over his brain for a minute.

"'Ang on Carol, lemme git dat fur ya," He took the basket out of her hands. Grunting exaggeratingly at the slight weight, "Wah ya got inna here Carol - bricks o' cement or sumthin'?"

The older woman smiled a little but didn't say anything. That was fine, Ash could talk more than enough for both of them.

They made their way around camp. Picking bots and pieces of dirty laundry hanging about. Carol didn't talk much, only nodding or letting out a soft murmur when expected. Ash on the other hand, wouldn't shut up. He could see that his mindless chatter was somehow soothing to the silver haired woman and didn't mind keeping up the small talk if it helped the meek woman relax for a while.

"Did I eva tell ya bout ma Sissy yet?" He asked as they fuckin' finally finished picking up everyone shitty laundry and made their way down to the lake. Carol perked up a little at that, a small shake of the head and a wordless "No" and Ash was off. His sibling pride demanding that he start bragging about his hardass Izzy right-da-fuck now.

"Ya know how da kids folla me all the time righ'?" The woman nodded,"My Izzy is even worse then me. Hadda build a fucking house from scratch ta hold all ah her brood!"

Carol blinked,"Brood?..."

Ash laughed,"She neva got preggers or nothin - she's ah nanny. Alla da kids an' babes at home 're hers cuz she been raisin' them fur years now." He set the box down to the side and started the shitty process of removing his socks and shoes. "A real hardass that bitch is,"Ash grunted,"Trained me an' Petie up ta her standa'ds, only reason da two o' us shitheads ar'alive righ' naw..."

Now barefoot and pants rolled up, Ash walked into the lake with the basket. A stream of swears leaving him as he waded through the cold as fuck water. "Fuckin' bullshit weather - it's fuckin' summa'! Haw da fuck is it dis cold!"

Carol laughed quietly, watching the brunette shiver and curse for a minute before speaking,"Your sister... she... trained you and your brother but she's a nanny? How... how did that happen?"

Ash smirked, dunking the laundry as he tried to find a way to explain Izzy to a civies like Carol.

"Well fur startas, Izzy is thirteen years olda then me. Mum an' Pa raised her up with diffrant standas... Pa wazza sold'ah back in the day an' if ya meet Izzy ya can tell."

Ash walked out of the water with the now slightly less shitty clothes and shook off what water he could. Then he straightened up. His face falling to a sarcastic, almost blank expression, and his shoulders seemed to have grown an inch. The brunette was a twig in comparison to his mountain of a brother but with a straightened spine and the swagger he carried he seemed fucking huge now.

Ash paced around Carol for a minute before dropping the mimic. Rolling his shoulders with a relieved huff as the strain finally went away. Trying to copy Izzy's body language strained him and left Ash feeling like crap every time.

Carol blinked, swallowing to ease her dry throat. "That's how your Sister acts? All-" She waved a hand helplessly and Ash snickered,"-that?"

"Yeppas," He smirked,"Whats even betta is that Izzy got ah Ma's gift, same as me. Fur sum reason kids like us an' track us down like bloodhounds if we stray too far away fur there likin'. Prob'ly why the munchkins falla me aroun' like babah chicks if I get too close."

"Ya mean da same munchkins dat came ta find me ya asshat?"

Ash jumped, whirling around to face a now smirking Petie with a giggling hoard of small kids behind him. Stupid Petie. "Da hell ya doin' sneakin' uppa me like dat ya fu-" Ash cut himself off looking at the little ones watching him with wide eyes. He turned to glare up at the smug shit. "Ya planned dis didn't ya?"

"Yah,"

Ash sighed before sitting. Snatching up his boots to shove his damp feet into. "Mind helpin' Carol wit da rest of dis ya jackass?"

"Yah, yah," Petie drawled, "Jus go be ya an' entatain da little ones fur a coupa ah hours."

Ash rolled his eyes and stood, stretched, then smiled down at his little hoard of kids with mischief. "Who wants ta play tag?"

Sophia squealed excitedly and tore off dragging little Megan and Stewie (Mexican Daddy's babies) back up to the woods. Carl just lifted his arms up with big ol' puppy eyes and a mischievous grin. "Carry me?"

Ash laughed and tugged the soft spoken baby up high onto his hip. Sending all the kids into a fit of giggles as he started up the chase.

* * *

Hours later and Ash was regretting _everything._

"Carl! You sick freak - let go of my kid bastard!" The damn trigger happy cop had returned from his little hunt in the woods and boooy was the man pissed. Ash was playing Superman with the kids, laying on the ground with his hands and (bare) feet in the air with kids taking turns balancing on top. Carl was Superman and was finally laughing when Shitty Shane showed up.

Ash hurried to place Carl down as Shane charged. "Dis is fuckin' bullshi-"

Shane threw a punch and the kids screamed. Ash had to take the hit because the kids had hidden behind him at the face of a raging adult. The punch hurt, made his ears ring and his eyes water from the pain in his cheek.

Shane reared back for another slugger when Carl darted forward, screaming and crying for Shane to stop, "We were playing! He was playing with me! I asked! I asked! Shane -STOP!"

Ash flinched at the cries and snatched up Carl. Cradling him close and shushing him as he tried to calm the eight year old down. Shane wasn't raging anymore but he hadn't calmed down either, only stepping back because of a frantic wave of adults rushing down the hill to the side of the lake got in his way.

The parents rushed forward and Carl was snatched out of Ash's arms by Lori only for the boy to start crying even harder. Infact, all the kids started bawling when their concerned parents tried to draw them away from Ash to check over.

Ash winced and smiled apologetically at the bewildered and hurt look on Lori's face as he took back Carl. "Ah'm sorray ma'am jus'- jus' give me ah moment to calm dem down an'-"

"And what?" Shane hissed, shoving his way forward in the crowd to yell at the visibly panicking brunette,"What the hell did you DO!"

Ash flinched back, shifting defensively and shuffling backwards. He didn't mean to, but it was second nature to back away.

All that did was make him seem guilty to the crowd. Not defensive and trying to seperate the kids from the shouting like he really was.

Where was Petie damnit!?

Ash swallowed,"I- I didn't do nothin' Shane. Da kids and I were jus' playin' but ya came stormin' ova an' now day're scah'ed an' Ah needa min ta cah'm dem down." His accent got thicker as his panic increased and Ash cursed internally as he felt his eyes burn in warning.

He'd never been the confrontational type and in all honesty Shane terrified him. He wasn't used to adults (or anyone really) being upset or genuinely angry at him.

Ash may be trained and he could take down Rotters with more ease than most but he was the softy in the family. He couldn't handle this kind of violence.

He could feel a panic attack coming on.

It didn't help that all the kids were clutching at him desperately and screaming at Shane between their hysterical sobs. Even the little ones that had been down for a nap back at camp were struggling to escape their parent's holds to cling to Ash. And _that_ pissed off the small mob _even more!_

God this was fucked up.

Shane was screaming at him, Lori was yelling all hurt and shit because Carl was wrapped around Ash and crying, ALL the kids were crying because of the screaming and Ash wanted to join them. He couldn't handle this. He really, really couldn't.

It wasn't the first time in the two months that the brothers had gotten stuck in some kind of stand-off with Shane. Most of the time the Petie was able to swoop in and distract Shane so Ash could run off. The blonde didn't think anything less of his younger brother for not being able to take the brunt of a screaming Shane's ire like he could. Ash knew this.

He was praying as he was surrounded by the crying and screaming that Petie would swoop in like the country bumpkin savior he was so Ash could finally calm down. If he could then he could get the kids to stop and maybe, maybe, they would go to their parents so Ash could stop getting yelled at by them.

Was it getting dark or was it just him?

* * *

Hundreds of miles away and a woman, with thick brown hair and dressed in typical farmer clothing, paused mid-sweep. She had been cleaning up the mess from one of Zachary's little "experiments" in the kitchen when she felt an...urge.

Her hands tightned on the broomstick as the urge built up, murderous and filling her with a need to pummel somethi- nooo... someONE.

 _CRAAAACK!_

The woman stared at the now broken broom blankly. She dropped the useless thing and stomped away, Zach could clean up his own fucking mess for once. She needed to go out and kill something before she started punching trees again.

"Petie ya betta fuckin' hurr'ah uhp an' git ta da Babay's rescue al'ead'ah. Onlay feel dis way when I need ta kill ah fucka' dat got too handsy wi' Ashy..."

* * *

Everyone's yelling was blurring together, some trying to defend Ash from the others while the majority were accusing him of brainwashing the children. Of hurting them and all kinds of dastardly things that made Ash _sick_ just thinking about it. It was getting darker too, the first signs of black curling in at the edges of his vision and his chest was aching from the lack of air. He couldn't calm down. His eyes hurt.

Shane was staring at him. All smug and with an ugly sneer as he stared down at Ash.

He wanted his big brother, he wanted Izzy, he wanted to be back at The Castle.

A sob passed his lips unbidden.

No one stopped yelling.

The brunette took a breath, zoning out as much as he could just concentrating on breathing. In, hold for three and out, hold for three. He kept repeating it to himself as he wheezed forcing himself down from a panic attack. Petie was out checking snares now that Ash thought about it, the blonde wouldn't be back for a good hour.

Ash swallowed, his panic attack finally under control. He licked his lips nervously before stuttering at the mob of angry people,"Y-ya scarin' da bahbies."

Lori recoiled at that, all righteous anger disappearing as she took in little Carl clinging to Ash's neck and the little ones hiding behind the twenty-four year old's legs. Of the sight of the young man himself barely holding back tears as he tried to calm down the crowd.

Ash, seeing Lori calmed down, tried again. "Ya'll... y-ya s-... Ya ahre scarin' da bahbies!" Ash shouted. A lick of his Mum's temper coming to rise as the shouting match continued,"Y'all - SHUT DA HELL UP!"

The crowd recoiled.

Ash let his anger take over when the so-called "adults" finally shut up. "YA IDGITS! AH WASA PLAYIN' WIT DA BAHBIES BA'FUR YA SHERRIF H'RE-" he gestured frustratedly at Shane, "CAM' A MARCHIN' OVA PICKIN' A FIGH'! I DINNA DO _NOTHIN'!"_

Ash huffed as the fire in him died out, leaving him exhausted beyond words as he stared at the crowd of adults slowly registering his words. Now he knew what his sissy meant by calling city folk "mob-brained sheeple". That had been terrible."Ah'ma takin' da bahbies bah' ta da cahmp naw, Ah needs ta cahm dem down an' _ya'll_ need to sort dis shit out." Ash hissed, snagging up a bawling Stewie onto his free hip and stomping his way back up to his and Petie's camp with his little hoard of crying kids on his heels.

Several of the sheeple behind him tried to snag up their kids anyway and Ash snarled. Teeth bared in an overly feral fashion and eyes narrowed to slits. Carol stepped forward then, a silver fox among the herd, quietly herding the children behind Ash.

She didn't speak, didn't make any eye contact, but somehow the sight of the quiet woman helped calm Ash down. He was pissed and fucking upset and he couldn't help the little pinpricks of tears in his eyes but...

But he was _thinking_ now. Again. Ash was thinking again.

Not rational but close enough.

"Carol... " Ash croaked, nudging little Sophia until she was flush between the two adults. "Can... Can ya carray bahbay Stewie fur meh? I- I gaht Carl a-an Lil' Lily's gunna wanna ah carry b-buht I... " Ash took a breath, shoving down the lump in his throat as he saw Lori inching closer as the rest of the group huddled and whispered as they watched him. "Hahp puhle's ma'am."

Carol nodded and slowly took Stewie from Ash, watching the both of them warily as she got the baby settled onto her hip. She took up Sophia's hand and shuffled forward. Inserting herself in the middle of the hoard of children as she started to the trail that led up and out of the small bowl of earth and lake.

Ash struggled to breath, choking back his jitters as he picked up little red head Lily. Sneaking a small kiss on her and Carl's forheads as he hushed to them. Crooning to his little hoard of short stacks as they made their way up to camp. Carol was waiting for them every couple of feet, watching in that silent way that reminded Ash _so much_ of Izzy that he wanted to hug her.

He clutched Carl and Lil' Lily instead as he struggled to climb with so many children yanking on his damn clothes.

"Ash...why was Shane so angry?"

Damn. Not even half way up the goddamn walk up the slope and Carl pulled a haymaker of a question. "W'll, sum peopl' jus' ahre angr'eh ahll de t'me...an' it's ah bi' easi'ah tha' most tah geht mad atta oth'ahs..." Ash bullshitted. He didn't know why Shane was so angry all the time - just knew he was a target of it whenever Shane got the chance.

Carl sniffled, fingers curling to tighten his grip on Ash's Tee, "I don't like Shane...he scares me Ash." The eight year old whispered. Lily nodded, red curls flying as she whispered back a hoarse"Yeah".

Shit. Ash kissed their foreheads again and picked up the pace, bypassing Carol as he sought to distance his midgets from the shit storm below them. "Ah dun like h'm much eitha'- let's make sum s'mores aht MY cahmp fire, awah frum Shane, oh'kay?" All of his kiddos perked up at that. Tears forgotten as they cheered for the promise of sugar. Started racing ahead the cheeky buggers.

Ash kept Carl close even as the kid cheered up, the kid's "confession" was worrying.

Lori and Shane were a _thing_ \- how the fuck was Ash going to keep the crazy ass cop away from Carl? Ash swallowed and shoved the thought away for later - for when Petie comes back. God, he wanted his crazy redneck brother to hurry the fuck up and get back to camp.

He needed a hug damnit.


End file.
